Oh Mother dear, I’m over here and I’m never coming back.
What keeps me here is the Beer, the Women and the Craic!
When we drink, we get drunk.
When we get drunk, we fall asleep.
When we fall asleep, we commit no sin.
When we commit no sin, we go to heaven.
So, let’s all get drunk, and go to heaven!
Here’s to a long life and a merry one.
A quick death and an easy one.
A pretty girl and an honest one.
A cold beer—and another one!
Best while you have it use your breath
There is no drinking after death.
In heaven there is no beer…
That’s why we drink ours here.
He that buys land buys many stones.
He that buys flesh buys many bones.
He that buys eggs buys many shells,
But he that buys beer buys nothing else.
Here’s to temperance supper,
With water in glasses tall,
And coffee and tea to end with —
And me not there at all!
An Irishman is never drunk as long as…
He can hold onto one blade of grass and …
Not fall off the face of the earth.
Old Irish toast
For every wound, a balm.
For every sorrow, cheer.
For every storm, a calm.
For every thirst, a beer.
A statesman is an easy man, he tells his lies by rote.
A journalist invents his lies, and rams them down your throat.
So stay at home and drink your beer and let the neighbors vote.
William Butler Yeats
The problem with some people is that
when they aren’t drunk they’re sober.
–William Butler Yeats
“I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society,
except that which makes to road safer, the beer stronger,
the old men and women warmer in the winter, and happier in the summer.”
Some Guinness was spilt on the barroom floor
When the pub was shut for the night.
When out of his hole crept a wee brown mouse
And stood in the pale moonlight.
He lapped up the frothy foam from the floor
Then back on his haunches he sat.
And all night long, you could hear the mouse roar,
“Bring on the goddamn cat!”
When money’s tight and hard to get and your horse is also ran,
When all you have is a heap of debt a pint of plain is your only man.
Old Irish toast
But the greatest love–the love above all loves,
Even greater than that of a mother…
Is the tender, passionate, undying love,
Of one beer drunken slob for another.
Irish love ballad
God invented whiskey so the Irish wouldn’t rule the world!
Work is the curse of the drinking class.
Here’s to cheating, stealing, fighting, and drinking.
If you cheat, cheat death.
If you steal, steal a woman’s heart.
If you fight, fight for a brother.
If you drink, drink with me!!